-Stewart Koppell
This is it: game point. Now is when the amateurs are separated from the athletes. I toss the perfect, white sphere six inches straight up. Everything moves in slow motion as I connect with the ball. It bounces once on my side of the table, then hurdles over the net to my opponent’s side. He’s crouching, ready to receive it, and counters my top-spin with his own side-spin. The ball whizzes back at me, curving through the air. I dive for it, and watch as the ball slips past my paddle. Game over. I attempt to break my paddle over my knee, but this is table tennis, not Wimbledon, and you can’t get as much leverage on paddles as you can on racquets. I limp back to my lunch table disheartened.
The competition in the Chap Court is intense these days. I and other self-proclaimed experts are the first ones to hit the tables and the last ones to leave. We play for high stakes (winner stays in). Some games attract crowds numbering in the 10s, and boisterous fans make extreme focus all the more vital.
Table tennis is on the rise all over the nation. Ever since it became an Olympic sport in 1988, people everywhere have begun to acknowledge that, while funny-looking, “ping-pong” is a serious sport of skill, endurance and strategy. And what other sport can claim that its name is an onomatopoeia? According to the International Olympic Committee, table tennis is “the world's largest participation sport, with 40 million competitive players worldwide and countless millions playing recreationally.”
Do you have what it takes to play with the pros? Think quick! A deadly 100 mph serve is coming at you! You have exactly .045 seconds (yes, I did the math) to figure out where it’s going, what kind of spin it has on it, and where you’re going to hit it back. My serves are closer to a somewhat-frightening 7 mph, but they definitely catch you off guard when you’re momentarily distracted.
Back at my lunch table, I am planning my glorious return. I must be patient. Table-tennis legends like Forest Gump weren’t immediate stars. Even Randy Daytona (star of Balls of Fury) went through a rough spot here and there. I need something to give me an edge. I’ve heard rumors of professionals using legal drugs like coffee to boost their performance, but I don’t want to do anything that hard core, and besides, I’m not really a coffee drinker. Better equipment would also be a good bet, but I can’t seem to locate (or afford) anything more expensive than my $16 paddle from Academy. I suppose my best strategy at this point is to continue my current training program: watching professional matches on YouTube and beating my little brother over and over.